Go Home, Spambot. You’re Drunk.

As you peruse the world wide web, you likely come across articles on so-and-so’s blog or such-and-such news site that allows comments. You read through these just to see what ridiculous words come out of folks’ fingers. You may not care for most of it, but some of it is at least entertaining. What you may not know is that those of us who allow comments our blog posts, articles, or web pages must daily filter through a lot of crap. I’m not talking about real reader’s thoughts. I’m talking about spam that’s likely computer generated and is the most abysmal maiming of language I’ve ever encountered. When I first began allowing comments on my website, the inundation of spam comments really annoyed me. I fussed and fumed, then eventually came to accept deleting them as one of those unpleasant yet necessary tasks much like cleaning the toilet. Finally, I began to read some of them…and laugh hysterically because it really is like watching a drunk person.

So I walk into a bar...
So I walk into a bar…

Submitted on 2015/01/19 at 9:05 pm

Drunk Medical Student Spambot says

Go in this particular place considering the cerebrovascular event; probable disappointment to wash indoors a to and fro movement.

HannaH Jane says:

That was astute. You even used a word I’ve never heard before. No, no need to explain! Because of my knowledge of roots and prefixes and paying attention in Biology, I was able to figure it out. I’ll try to avoid to and from movements when I wash indoors. I’m sure it will be good for my cerebrovascular health.

Submitted on 2015/01/20 at 7:22 am

Drunk Tolkien Fan Spambot says

It may be the most inspiration to look at your clasp as to elvish courts terms, then respectfully make sure they know which the orc is very secure, But not particularly smart.

HannaH Jane says:

Thank you for your valuable insights into elvish court etiquette. I’m sure I will find it most useful when I visit Middle Earth.

Submitted on 2015/01/20 at 12:05 am

Drunk Fashionista Spambot Who Recently Took A Cruise says

which might be steerage to be able to to chat really, Ugg hiking footwear has been steerage which can traditionally become the identity for the fact engineering and system.

HannaH Jane says:

I was completely unaware that Ugg hiking footwear was such a critical component of steerage. I’m sure freighter captains are eternally grateful to the footwear manufacturers for enabling them to maneuver their ships, especially when they are loaded with cargo. And who knew that Uggs were responsible for making facts?

Submitted on 2015/01/20 at 4:47 pm

$#!%faced Spambot says

solitary young is going to personally own one, standard more healthy, white, press button low blouse.

HannaH Jane says:

I have no clue what you just said.

Submitted on 2015/01/21 at 9:04 am

Drunk Hippie Spambot says

merely promptly after one night of belly dancing, often that you have in actual fact allowed several of those crystals around the club bottom.

HannaH Jane says:

I’m not worried. I do all of my belly dancing at home rather than clubs.

Submitted on 2015/01/19 at 6:24 pm

Drunk CEO Spambot says

If it happens to be something different, may trauma your company wellingtons,

HannaH Jane says:

Mmmmm….yeah…gotta look after my company wellingtons.

Submitted on 2015/01/20 at 11:53 pm

Drunk Spambot Who Can’t Find Its Way Home says

lost what to consider that certain,

HannaH Jane says:

Me too, Buddy… me too.

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